If you're anything like me, you have probably spent time looking to make your life work, improve it, become happier, or whatever. Our spiritual ideas seem to offer this to us, and they seem so much loftier and far beyond the petty imaginings of mere mortals with thier cars, relationships, and world of instant gratification.
Looking more closely, we can see that our attempts at 'spirituality' are basically the same as our 'materialistic' attempts- I want to feel good, right now. I tried to meditate my pain away, attempted to chant myself into oblivion, and to pray my problems into solutions. I sought different masters with different ideas, pursued various philosophies, and changed my mind about all the 'important' spiritual issues over and over.
All of this was like trying to put a band-aid on a bottomless pit. Instant gratification moved into a new sort of realm, and my seeking continued. The trouble was, as always, a sort of compromising on my part, and a reluctance to get down and dirty with who I really was, and who I was really pretending to be. A short-lived meditation high comes and goes, but what I really am never has, and never will. I had to stop compromising what I really am, and stop chasing fleeting experiences, even if they are filled with bliss, spiritual fireworks, and awe from friends. Just looking right now, I see that I am the space in which things arise. The awareness behind the content, arising as the content. If you have a look, you'll see the same is true for you. Time to take off the band-aid, the blinders, and stop with the bullshit; no more seeking, just the Seeing.